Have Brain Cloud. Need Help. Please Send Chocolate and Feng Shui Expert.

I said to my son, "Go, and take paper and markers and draw Noah's ark, for it is school-time." And behold, a bear appeared, and lo, it was very cute. And I delighted in the drawings of my son.

And I heard, as it were, a shout from two children, screaming to hear their own voices echo within the house of the Stevensons. In the midst of the bedroom, I saw two eggs cracked upon the carpet and play dishes. And behold there was a small child clothed in a vesture dipped in egg yolk frying forbidden eggs within her little pans. And I took many waters and tried to scrub the carpet. And upon the carpet was found no more blemish. And lo, I rescued an egg and cracked it within my pan upon a flame, for it was lunchtime.

And after these things, a great multitude of Playmobil animals came down, upon our windowsill, in groups of two.

And after two hours Luxie shall awake and shall be loosed from her crib. And I sat upon a cushion, and behold I saw a filthy bedroom full of great abominations and clutter. Cloth and paper and laundry stacked as a great wall. And a great, messy shelf shewed itself to me, and boxes on which are written "PHOTOS, SEWING, and CRAFTS" in great disarray. And after these things I had a dream of a bedroom that shone like unto a stone most precious, even like a jasper stone, clear as crystal. And lo the bedroom windows are clothed in fine linen, white and clean. And many neat stacks of clothing and fabric and books have been arrayed in tidy shelves. She that overcometh will inherit a good feeling and vanquish the Beast of Confusion and Chaos that dwelleth within her room. And lo, I awoke from the dream, and I saw a pillar of smoke coming from the kitchen. And lo, my lunch was very, very burnt, yea, unto ash.